And the results are in!

You hear about it, but many times it’s just out there happening to others... sometimes, it’s close to home. No one ever really feels that their going to get Cancer, but when you get the news, it’s… WOW!  - OMG, what did you say? I have Cancer. 

I just found out that the biopsy results show that I have squamous cell carcinoma. Anal Cancer. WTF! Our bodies are made up of squamous cells… They multiply, but when one area multiplies faster that normal, it develops into a cancerous area. (Still discovering WTF this is) Either way... it just happens. There are some leading causes and I can say that I am guilty of some of the things that are on that list, but that was SOOOOO long ago. Like 20+ years ago, but… life does have a way of catching up to you. Fore sure!

I just got the news yesterday and it hasn’t sunk in yet. I’m definitely still processing. Very emotional right now!!! I have zero family history of Cancer in my entire family. My mom had thyroid cancer, but her doctor’s told her it was job related. Who knows how true that is, but she did work with radiation in her career at Pearl Harbor; so maybe that’s true. Who really knows!

I was emotional yesterday. I called and talked to all the important people in my life about this, especially my kids. I don’t know much right now as further testing is needed first but after processing things thus far… I have made some decisions as of right now.

First is… as unhappy as I was because of Fred, he gave me the gift of discovering that he was the surface of something greater. I still had to evict him since he hasn't left in 8 months and he is kind of a pain in my ass; but if it wasn’t for Fred, I wouldn’t have discovered the Cancer. The underlying issue of why I had surgery in the first place is still there, but at least I have answers now. Some, but even more questions. Ugh… and so it’s the gift that keeps giving!

It feels like it has been FOREVER that I have been making ass jokes about my Fred situation, but all jokes aside. Thank you, Fred, for showing up to reveal that you were just a warning sign to something greater. Glad you’re gone, but thank you!