Shakin things up!

Maybe not until I was in my late 20’s did I start bringing structure into my life. I needed to be, to keep things straight with all that goes on in this busy world of mine! It was how I kept myself sane through all the craziness of running and staying busy all the time. I can still hear people say to me “don’t you ever rest?” My answer, “nope and if you knew the women in my family, you would see where I get it from”

In the past, that has served me well, (it may be age) but I have been recognizing that life has become so busy, too busy that I don’t like it anymore! Not at all! Don’t get me wrong, there are days where I go, go and go, but there are the days where I JUST DON’T WANT TO! Those days are happening more and more often, and I feel a shift happening in my life. What shift? I have no idea, but I can feel that something is changing. Tearing down those beliefs and allowing new ones to unfold.

While I was working, I was busy. Despite leaving my job, still busy. Just a different kind of busy. Labor of love, really! Tiresome, but rewarding work. Lately I haven’t been able to sustain the energy to go to the gym and do yard work/planting. No joke, landscaping is a lotta work! I feel like I’ve just traded one kind of busy for another and feeling guilty for not going to the gym, but also… giving myself permission to just be. It is what I wanted, but I’m so over this year’s planting season.

I realized yesterday that the shift may be good for me and I need to be open about it. Maybe I need to be more fluid with things and my life. Don’t get me wrong, still setting goals and learning more about what brings me joy, but I’m literally tearing down what once was in trying to discover what may be.

Here’s to still staying open despite the bad days and picking myself up and giving myself permission to just be. -Thank you!

Ever make a promise to yourself…

I remember not to long ago when I promised that I would not allow my job to overrun my life. I truly wanted to have balance. Well here I am again; my job has taken over. Why? How?

I feel like I am at a point in my life where, I’ve raised my kids. They are clear across the other side of the country, and their boys, so I never really hear from them as they are busy with their own lives. I’m thankful that they are independent and have their stuff all figured out. As to me, I have finished my education as far as I want to take it, and now it’s about my career, myself, and my relationships with others.

I started working with this company as an Office Manager, but the plan was that I would eventually step into the position of the Controller, once the Controller had left. So that has happened, and it’s amazing the things you find out when that other person leaves. Or shall I say how many things, I didn’t know about. I’m a fighter, and I jumped in with both feet. My challenge is that my staff are time clock watchers, and I feel that if you focused on the job instead of what time it was, then you would be more productive. So, since my staff are more about working their exact shift, it leaves the burden of the department on me. I’m the boss, I get paid the “big bucks” therefore the necessity of the department is my responsibility. What is upsetting, is that I’ve allowed it to get this far before I made changes. I’ve allowed it to overrun my life, my schedule, and intrude on those important things in my life. The past few months of changes have made my department very disruptive, and I’ve had times where I was in tears. That was a learning experience! Well, a few weeks ago, I decided that enough was enough, I was done. I’ve decided to become clear in what I want! AND I have… and when I did… the right people crossed my path.

The good news, is that I’ve finally hired someone to relieve me from the stress load of this job, I have a lot of things to do, and a longer of list of tasks that need to get handled, but I’m super excited for the transition, and happy that transition is on it’s way.

This is to me, for having the awareness that things aren’t right, and things need to change. This is to me, for having the wisdom to recognize that old patterns are… no, have creeped back into my life and it’s time to reclaim it back.

I have a short vacation planned for next week, another short cruise to the Bahamas, and an opportunity to jumpstart this change of reclaiming my “personal” life back.

Cheers to having a Saturday off, and some of my energy back to doing more of the things I love to do.

Got teenager's???

I do; 2 boys & for me... I've learned that life keeps moving forward no matter what happens. I do see problems as an opportunity for a solution & I love life with a grateful heart. The choices we make, determine the path or outcome....

A good friend sent this to me, and I'd love to share with those who might b interested.... If you have a teen, invest in being open to new concepts. I did a long time ago and that is mainly why my boys and I are really close.

Here's the link & the email is below.... http://grownups.heyjosh.com/cmd.php?Clk=3336960

How many of these mistakes can u actually relate with? Or do you get angry by Josh's theory about our mistakes with teenagers? His story is amazing!

Here's what I got.... Outta 5; I've changed 2 of them. -I am so grateful for that awareness. AND -Yeah I am not perfect, and I can still relate to 3 other mistakes. One of those mistakes is a close personal challenge; I'm facing right now. -Mistake #4 Two of them I've become aware of and are in transition of changing. Mistakes 3&5 Some days I feel like a hypocrite and others, well I wish I had a magic wand. I think its funny; the mind frick we listen to within our own minds. -Where we choose to give our personal power. I am fortunate to have a very close relationship with my boys... It's just us and we all understand, that we need to work together if we want our family to work. Were not perfect, and mistakes happen along the way. I asked CJ to read the pdf doc of Josh's Mistakes theory and he shared, that he could agree that these 5 are true and that he can relate with a few of them, right now. Thanks, I'm working on, and I'm so glad to hear that I'm going the right way.. Happy Halloween folks! -------- Original Message -------- Subject: got teens? Alert. From: "Patrick Combs" Date: Wed, October 21, 2009 6:14 am To: "Kim H" Hi Kim, Got Teens? If yes, check out this new release from my friend Josh Shipp. With more than a decade of real-world, hands-on experience working with millions of teens, Josh is one of the most dynamic and entertaining experts for teens I’ve ever seen. (I've been impressed by him for years). Today is the release of his new product. It bottles his magic in an innovative, accessible, life-changing solution for adults and teens to tackle teens’ #1 issue head-on. I highly recommend this product, and you've rarely heard me say that before. I got a sneak peek at the product and let me tell you: this is going to change teens lives like nothing else I’ve seen. Take advantage his expertise, help a teen, and visit his site: http://grownups.heyjosh.com/cmd.php?Clk=3336960 It's a VERY comprehensive program for teens to discover who they really are while giving parents / teachers / mentors the tools to engage teens more effectively and authentically. Sharing Success, Patrick PS - Teens really need to know who they are, so that their self-image isn't defined by others messed up or low opinion. http://grownups.heyjosh.com/cmd.php?Clk=3336960 Good Thinking Co., Inc. 2240 Encinitas Blvd., Ste. D-140 Encinitas, CA 92024 1-858-759-6994 Patrick Combs www.GoodThink.com www.coachedbyPatrick.com Deanna Latson www.GoToHealth.com www.coachedbydeanna.com

Why do I understand what I’m doing, thinking and feeling wrong? YET I still do it?

Why do I understand what I’m doing, thinking and feeling wrong? YET I still do it?

I understand what changes I have to make but I still fall back into those old thoughts and feelings.

How do you quiet the chatter of your EGO mind and start to feel?

My mind, that just wants to focus on our debt by being scared. My mind wants me to focus that Tom and I are not “employed” so this fear has me scared of where the money is coming in from for our lifestyle…. It’s the conditioning of my parents. If you work hard then you get ahead. But I already know that’s a lie. I know that we have a true amount of abundance in our life. It’s the conditioning of my parents; really my dad. He always taught me to pay in cash or it’s not something you need right now. So I feel that even though I have an incredible amount of abundance in my life… since it’s on credit and mortgages, I feel massively in debt. Conditioning + EGO is tough!

Tom and I used to have jobs. The hours sucked, you never saw your family(kids), you had to check someone else’s schedule before you could plan your own vacations, and the money wasn’t really what you wanted to make anyways. So we quit our jobs and became “Self Employed”

Tom and I work out butts off in our contracting business(more paperwork and taxes!) and we barely made it. That is the business did, but what about us personally. Tom did as many side jobs, and I took on a few clients. I prayed that everything would work out; I would stress myself out in worry. -Again my EGO mind.

So here’s my biggest one... I’m not working right now, and I’m scared because all of our financial requirements are for Tom to figure out. It’s not me taking care of my own responsibilities; I’m relying on someone else. Is that my EGO or old conditioning of “working hard?”

So I’ve been working with a wonderful therapist for 10 years in helping me put my life back on track from where it was. That was a long time ago, and I will say that I have had tremendous growth in this journey. I still have this massive hump to get over but I know that the answers I have been seeking all this time is coming soon.

I just wanted to blog today instead of journal and share with you my own struggles of quieting my EGO mind and changing the conditioning of my past. I jump in my thoughts as my mind just runs and runs. Quieting this mind has been a challenge!.

This energy aspect is so amazing to me. Even though I struggle in changing those habits, I know that I can overcome this and create a blissful life with my ever so loving and patient husband and our 4 children.

Today I am truly grateful for color. ~A color either inspires you by uplifting you, or is dark and dreary and brings you down. We started to paint our house the other day, and it’s amazing how color changes everything.