Sharing my JOURNEY....

Friday, September 26, 2008

Just feel like writing today I guess....

I am not a joke or a toy that can be abused.
I’m all about communication and explanation.

I’m 32 and I know that I am searching for something unconsciously because I feel drawn to the energy. So I’m open.

I feel as if everything is going to be ok. Not sure how though???

But here I am starting a new chapter of my life of doing and living a fun and enriching life. I am deeply passionate about helping people. –That’s the direction I am drawn to….

I love to talk…. And I love an intellectual conversation that I can relate too. I love the growth in learning new perspectives and stimulating my thoughts….

I am all about personal growth and my journey is of sharing my life’s experiences with others and trusting that something I said sparked something deep within them.

I realized that in order for me to get connected to me again…. I had to get rid of my dirty bastard x-husband. AND That’s CRAZY! To me. I felt as if I gave him everything, and in the end I got shit on because he couldn’t handle it.

I am young and looking for some sense of peacefulness and security with a lax lifestyle. I eat all organic, natural, raw and whole foods. Not a vegan for sure… I believe in saving the planet and breathing healthy air. All natural cleaning products are important to me and getting exercise. I LOVE to cook and I LOVE to dance. I’m going to have FUN and raise my boys. They are 15 and 12 and I’m so grateful that they are not too young to stay at home by themselves.

I’m an open and honest and I’m not looking to play a game with my life. I am looking for stability so I can focus on the more important things.

I am a slender energetic woman who believes in having integrity!

I have many challenges in my life right now… but I will tell you that I am a charging Rhino who is on a mission to overcome whatever comes within my path of my goals.

I am always looking for more friends in my life. A good social lifestyle is healthy for me.

Just more thoughts for today…

Thursday, September 25, 2008

Taking out the garbage....

Why am I attracting more and more detours in my life? I don’t mind the challenges but MAN I can only handle so many of those on my plate. (someone else has another plan for what path I'm on)

What am I focusing on right now that keeps these situations coming along?

I feel as if it’s NOT me it’s other people’s decisions. I can’t control other people and what they choose to do.

Dirty Bastard’s, I feel sorry for them. It’s sad to me to see the choices they make and deal with the consequences for “ME” Ahhhh it’s all about being in CONTROL, and that is what I feel drives them.

This brings me to my thoughts of my own strength within myself. The keyword being; “ME” Yes that is who I am at the core.

No matter what comes my way I feel as if I can overcome it! Is this the answer of how I’m continually bringing upon myself more challenges? No really? Oh shit, I’m going to be changing that record from this point forward.

Thank you for the awareness. Yes this wisdom to see what can be done VS focusing on what is going wrong.

Today I feel at calm. Whatever happens will happen and that is the way it is supposed to be. I will deal with it when it gets to that point. Right now I’m in this moment and it’s so calming!!!

So I’m going dancing on Friday night. I gotta run a few errands but after that I’m free for the better part of the day. A moment for “ME” I’m super excited!

To live and love!


Sunday, September 21, 2008

Worked HARD this weekend

Boy do I ever feel accomplished today. Driven to knock things off my to do list.
And I DID! YES I feel so powerful right now.

My hands have been used and abused this weekend. They are sore. But I scraped off the tile in my kitchen today, and over the course of the weekend I emptied all the garbage out of Burlington and into a dumpster, and hauled the wood to Snohomish for CJ. -It looks so much nicer.

Yes it was hard work and I did it myself, and for once I truly feel accomplished. It was NEW challenging work and I’m definitely going to feel it in my muscles tomorrow.

Today there was another hurdle put forth in front of me and I must take a step back and allow life to unravel itself. -Right?

Yes I can analyze it, but I feel as if I need to sit back and just keep focus on what I want. Stay out of my head. Feel with my heart and soul….

Monday, September 8, 2008

Cherish the moments as they come and go very quickly

I decided on late Friday, early Saturday morning that I was going to take the weekend off. Just relax… -So much for relaxing!?$#

This weekend was such a productive weekend though! I feel great about my progress and my new discoveries……

The kids and I were able to have a few days to get some stuff done that we have been putting off for quite sometime now….and yes we had fun doing it! It feels good to get things done!!!!! Like a weight has been lifted. At least that is the way it is for me.

Thank you for the time to get those things done and the decision to do so.

Today I had such a wonderful day! It was so beautiful and sunny.

I was so grateful that I chose not to be the handyman and work on drywall, flooring, siding, tape n texture and you know the manly stuff…. Instead I got my house in order and cleaned up.

I just want to take a second and say thank you to my soon to be x-husband….
AKA: Dirty Bastard. Thanks for walking out on me and leaving me with all of our financial responsibility and the chores of finishing up all your unfinished projects. I truly have learned a lot from this experience.

OK it’s late and I have lots to do on my Monday….

Today I am grateful for my children, my dooger dogs, my friends, myself, my choices, my experiences, laughter, the sunny skies, the surroundings of my home and the universe for being so abundant. I am truly blessed by this experience within my journey. Thank you!!!!!!

Friday, September 5, 2008

Just another day along this bumpy road....

Today I am a little tired. OK a lot! I feel as if I am a bit out of sorts. My decisions have been a little slack and my judgment has been affected. This is not good. Must change it!

I have distractions in my life and I am not going to allow them to continue. Time to get focused in on what it is I want. -Time to start the manifestation process for some things.

I feel as if I have too much on my plate… Now the solution is to start eliminating what’s there.

It’s 9 -something and I’m tired. For once I am giving in to my body and listening to it. It’s telling me that I’m exhausted and sleep is needed.

To all my friends a BIG thank you for everything that you guys have done I truly am indebted to you for your generosity.

Today I am thankful for the rays of the sun as they keep my body from getting cold. I’m also thankful for knowing what I should be doing and having the able body to do it!

Love and Light!

Monday, September 1, 2008

I've decided! to just DO IT!

Ever since I got dumped by Tom back in July.... I have not really done anything for myself... It's been work, work and not really a bunch of play.... Not good... I know better than to neglect myself.

Starting to go a bit crazy.... I decided the other day that I MUST take out 1 night a week and go do something!

Since I LOVE to dance it would be just that. SO this Wednesday I am going out to go dance the night away. Making new friends and I try to have fun everyday, but some days that is not an option.... I am just so busy. BUT the silver lining is that things are slowing down and the kids are getting back to school. Structure....YES!

Just a quick update on me.... life is great! I keep acquiring new clients just in the course of talking with people. I'm not even trying, as accounting is not what I want to do.... BUT it pays the bills so I'm doing it until I find something else.

Just making friends down here so that I have a wonderful supportive network, and I do but they are all mostly in Skagit County. I need some friends that are closer....

I'm manifesting wonderful things to me and staying above ground.

Thank you for the appreciation I have for my life.