Tuesday, January 15, 2013

Truth for what it is

As the girlfriend of my wonderful partner, I just cannot stay quiet any longer. I have been patient with all of this but I am now venting from a perspective I feel is appropriate for this situation. I am so beside myself that this anger and drama is in my life at the hands of someone else; I am so enraged at how my partner’s ex-wife is seeking out ways to catastrophically ruin his life and career. All because she has created this story that she truly wholeheartedly believes. Just because it is untrue, doesn’t mean it’s untrue in her mind; she is mentally unstable and in my opinion, emotionally hurt that my partner no longer has any desire to stay in an abusive and hurtful relationship. Using the kids and threats to keep him in a situation that is self-destructive is certainly unhealthy and I am SO proud to see him grow to a point to take a stand. In my eyes… to see the path and have the courage to make those hard choices, takes guts!

As a victim myself of a child crime, a crime where the gentleman was never criminally prosecuted due to his age; made me so angry, angry with myself, my parents, and especially with the person who committed those acts against me. “An innocent child” What did I do, all my life growing-up, I self-destructed, and rebelled against everyone. The memories of the experience have stayed with me my entire life, and for the most part they don’t affect me as much as they used to, with the exception of the intimacy with my partner. Painfully there are intimate situations where I have to make myself listen to the “self-talk” telling myself that it’s OK. Honestly, no person should ever have to go through that, but the fact is there are some of us who do.

My partner has been kicked, kicked, kicked, and kicked and when he finally was able to become strong enough to pick himself up and walk away, he was threatened by his ex-wife that she would ruin his life. Despite the threats he left and continues to be drug through hell, because one woman can’t let go!

You can only kick a person so many times before they are going to get sick of it and start figuring out that they must take precautions and start protecting themselves.

What I don’t understand is why??? Pride??? If the stories she told were actually true, justice would have been done. You blame it on the loop holes in the law; look at the facts! The fact is he has proven time and time again that these stories are untrue. The truth of the matter is my partners ex-wife kicked him so many times and if he didn’t submit to what she was asking… then she would threaten him of taking his family away from him. Bottom-line. He did whatever she wanted and in the end he lost all of his children and lost a very promising career. Of course her children are going to believe whatever the she tells them. As children we are born to rely and trust our parents.

It’s just such a shame to see these kids lose a father who truly loves them; it’s a shame to see these children believe a lie that isn’t even true, and for all the years and time they will be without knowing the truth and having their own father in their life. He has sacrificed everything to just do what he thought was right for his children and his family; even in sacrificing his own beliefs and himself. I hope as human beings they grow up to have the desire to want to seek out the truth and see the true colors and actions that really did take place because one person couldn’t let go!

I love this man with all my heart and I will boldly say that love is NOT blind in this situation. I see and feel a deep connection with my partner that I know without a doubt in my mind that this is all about revenge and needing to find satisfaction and peace from something that is outside of oneself. That is truly sad to me. I feel sad for the generational errors that are being passed onto these children by just being in and around this type of behavior. We are born innocent but we learn from what we see.

Time will pass and the truth will be revealed for what it really is. We have decided to not get swallowed into the drama and publicity that is knocking at our door. We just don't have the desire to give any energy into this "crap"